Sunday, March 21, 2010

Learn to Love Yourself

Learning to Love Yourself …

An unfortunate side effect of low self-esteem is that you stop being nice to yourself and don’t show yourself the love and respect you deserve.

You probably demand too much from yourself and push yourself to do more and be more than is really necessary.

Now you might be saying there’s nothing wrong with wanting to do and be better. That is true – but it’s the driving factor that might be of concern – is it healthy or unhealthy?

Healthy - You set goals for yourself that encourage you to grow and stretch. You accept and love yourself as you are but know that you can always be better.  You do not beat yourself up if you don’t hit your goal the first time.  You just pick yourself up and get going again.

Unhealthy - You are constantly beating yourself up because you believe that you need to overwork or punish yourself for not being “good enough”. You believe you have to achieve these unrealistic goals to be “worthy”.

Raise your self-esteem by beginning to accept, love and value yourself. All of the time from this moment on.

 

Does that sound impossible?

As difficult as it may seem, you need to learn how to love yourself NOW, exactly as you are in this moment. I won’t tell you it will be easy, but it is achievable if you’re willing to put in the effort.

A common trait of low self-esteem is that you believe there is nothing lovable or valuable about you.

You might believe you won’t be worthy of love until you lose weight, meet Mr. or Ms. Right, when you become a better mother, father, sister, friend, employee, citizen, and so on.

You have believed these lies long enough …

You are a unique special human being!!!

Two Ways to Start Loving Yourself Right Away:

1. Speak Kindly to Yourself

Like most people with low self-esteem, you probably have an ongoing negative monologue playing in your head – and you don’t even know it!

This chatter is filled with negative comments and perceptions about yourself, and it keeps you feeling badly about yourself. In order to turn it around, you’ll need to start replacing those negative messages with more positive ones.

You won’t be able to turn it around completely right away, but if you work at it a few times each day, you’ll eventually begin to feel more positive about yourself.

Praise yourself when you do something well.

Say positive things about yourself. Look in the mirror and compliment yourself (”I have a nice smile”, “I like my eyes” etc.)

Don’t recite these comments. Be sincere, use a kind and loving tone that you would use with he people you love and care about.

You might feel a little silly – that’s ok. Laugh at yourself if you want to – because laughter actually helps you take yourself less seriously and makes the process of learning to love yourself more fun.

2. Emphasize Your Positive Traits

Spend a few minutes each day focusing on your positive traits and capabilities. What character traits do you like? What characteristics do others see and like?

You might have a wicked sense of humor that serves you well. You might be a caring, kind giving person. Maybe you are a good cook, or good at organizing.

The items you choose to focus on don’t really matter, except that they are true about you.

Besides boosting your self-esteem, this type of activity can also help you become more confident too! As you keep emphasizing the things you’re good at, you’ll get bolder about finding out what else you can do well – and probably discover that you’re capable of a whole lot more than you ever realized!

Share and Enjoy!

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Information on this site is provided for fun and informational purposes only.
It is not meant to substitute for the advice of a mental health professional. The author has no relevant training in psychology or psychiatry


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